My partner and I, as we stand here, have survived the four years of relationship milestones, including the pandemic lockdown months. These were months that have been a trial to survive in one studio apartment, but now we are more assured about our future—to obviously include marriage. Sure, we are solid, but sometimes those cycles of unproductive communication hold us down. Knowing that it would be wiser and bringing an added set of challenges with planning for many years together, we decided to pursue premarital counseling to better our relationship before heading into aisle-life.
We were to be married within a few months, and looking for someone who would fit both of our schedules, preferences, and budgets seemed a challenge. My fiancé and I both run businesses on our own and many times have conflicting schedules. It was then that we came across Ours, an online couples’ counseling platform designed for couples like us who need flexible, accessible premarital counseling. Ours was still in its “beta” phase, evolving from self-guided “Loveware” to live sessions, but the fresh, user-friendly approach made it compelling enough for us to decide to give it a go.
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Neither of us had been to couples counseling much beforehand — my partner attended just a few sessions during a prior relationship — so we went into Ours with a healthy dose of both skepticism and hope. Although the research concerning the effectiveness of premarital counseling is somewhat limited, it does suggest that premarital counseling can dramatically improve marital satisfaction and reduce the divorce rate. For instance, one study discovered that couples that went through premarital counseling were more maritally satisfied than 80% of those that did not. Another couple found a 31% lower divorce rate among those receiving premarital counseling.
Our experience with Ours helped us realize, perhaps, why these findings might hold true. On a personal note, here’s how a few sessions with Ours set us on the path to a much healthier and happier future together.
What is Ours?
Ours focuses on relationship therapy, and it has processes for unmarried couples, people contemplating marriage and those engaged or married. It targets “busy, discerning couples looking for experienced, world-class couples therapists.” When we went to the service, Ours was in its beta phase dealing only with virtual therapy sessions, which drew a lot of attraction to our busy schedules.
Previously, Ours offered a self-guided program they called “Loveware,” a bundle of modules and activities for couples to complete together, supplemented by video sessions with a therapist. By late 2023, though, Ours had phased out Loveware in favor of traditional couples counseling. We opted for this new format, which was exclusively virtual and limited to a select number of couples during the beta phase.
Ours offers video sessions of 60 minutes with therapists, which customers can purchase individually, in a four-pack, or as part of a monthly subscription under which the customer will receive four sessions per month at a reduced rate.
How Much Does Ours Cost?
Ours has three types of pricing plans for the therapy sessions:
A la carte: $200 per session
Four-session package: $180 per session, $720 total
Monthly subscription: $150 per session, four sessions for $600 per month
Moreover, it costs $50 for the first session. One constraint of Ours—and a common one when it comes to couples therapy—is that they don’t take insurance.
Signing Up for Ours
Their website is slick and minimal, clearly designed for millennials with its warm, minimalist design and chatty tone. It was infuriating that no real information was given about who would be counseling us. I found that signing up wasn’t very complicated, although. After taking a quick quiz about our relationship and therapy goals, we selected a four-session package.
Initially, when we signed up in May 2023, there were no therapists available. However, customer support followed up with us in August and guided us through an additional questionnaire that would help match us with therapists. Within a few days, we had received a match with two therapists, presented via a delightfully nostalgic slide show. While both of the suggested therapists appeared adequate for our needs, we picked one that reflected our personality better.
How our therapy sessions with Ours went
Therapy started with an introduction session—first jointly, then followed up on each, which was helpful. Of course, there was a little technical disruption at first, but no problem once that got sorted out. Our therapist had this light, calm demeanor that kept him interested with good questions about our origins and family systems and what we wanted from the relationship.
The individual sessions enabled us to talk about more personal issues and how they may impact our future together. Although we experienced a few logistical issues—such as having to exchange several emails and telephone calls related to the problems with the Zoom links—the quality itself concerning the therapy was good. Our therapist helped guide us through our concerns and gave hope for our marriage.
Features and Future Prospects
Ours started with self guided modules via Loveware, which I accessed by request. Though a bit cheesy in places those modules had useful exercises and insights into communication and relationship dynamics. Today, Ours provides its digital tools like “Rose Bud Thorns” for weekly reflections, while “Card Decks” make it easier to discuss hard topics. There are also interviews with couples who got it right and extra blog posts on all manner of relationship topics.
Switching Therapists
Ours allows for free-of-cost switching of therapists, an avenue we didn’t use but found comforting. Not only does this flexibility ensure that at all times the requirements of the client are met, it also, far too often than usual, unnecessarily raises doubts about the quality of the first therapist assigned.
Pros and Cons
Pros:
Responsive customer service
Peerless user-friendly website and interface
License and qualification of therapists
Personalized
Cons:
Lack of transparency in pricing
Technical glitches sometimes
Self-guided software that’s gradually being phased out
Final Thoughts
Even though there were one or two technological mishaps, our overall experience with Ours was quite positive. The approach taken by our therapist invited beginners into the counseling sessions and proved effective. Although we haven’t booked sessions, we will remain open to continuing therapy with Ours in the future.
While Ours’s premarital counseling services may be a bit pricier compared to some of their competitors, we believe that the quality of therapy more than offsets the cost. We would thus recommend Ours to any couple seeking convenient and effective premarital counseling en route to a healthy marriage. However, couples with deeper issues might need a more intensive therapy program.
Methodology
To review the best online therapy programs, we surveyed 100 users of each service and received qualitative and quantitative data on usability without any difficulties of a website, therapist qualification, types of offered therapies, and quality of care. Further, we looked at the client-therapist communication and sessions’ length, subscription offerings, the safety of their clients’ private data protection, cost, and overall user satisfaction. This comprehensive approach enabled us to compare services offered by each company as accurately as possible.